To watch video: hit II on the playlist...
DH has been Mr Grouch again lately. Yesterday he got that look in his eye and I had flashbacks of my 1st marriage to him. Things were so different then and I divorced that man. I hate that man. Yesterday for the 1st time in this marriage I could picture that man as the one standing in front of me. I was scared, heartbroken, anxious and I didn't like it one bit. It all happened because it was time for Honeybunches to take a bath. He refused. DH tried to deal with him and that didn't go so well. He got very frustrated, was yelling and all that mess. That just made the situation worse so I intervened. DH threatened me. He didn't touch me though, but close enough. I told him that I didn't want to live with him anymore. I am done. He refused to leave. Today I am still so mad at him. I told him that he needs to go to the hospital. He said maybe he should. I told him that I don't like him. I really don't. I feel like I am done. I didn't reply to his mentioning that. My mother taught me if I don't have anything good to say, then don't say anything at all lol.
Honeybunches had a pretty good day at school today, until the end of the day. He didn't want to get on the bus. He threw everything off his desk and some others. He tried to kick his 1:1 aide. Once they got him to calm down, he refused to get on the bus and laid down on the floor. I actually had to go to school to pick him up. The teacher said he had to be restrained by his aide. That hasn't happened in a while. I think that's probably related to things with DH last night. IDK though. The teacher wonders if it could also be the weather changing so much. It was so beautiful last week in the 70s and only in the low 40s yesterday and today. When speaking about the weather she mentioned how he didn't go outside to play yesterday or today, which was also different she said.
Shnooks is 18 today. I sent him this message on Facebook:
"Happy Birthday to you ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•*
¨*•♫♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥
¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪ Happy Birthday Dear ________ !!!!! ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥
¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪ Happy Birthday to you! ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♥
Cha Cha Cha!!!
Happy Birthday _____ and welcome to adulthood! I hope that life treats you well. Remember if you get in any trouble now you'll go to big boy jail lol. I am proud of you on your job and your upcoming graduation. Keep up the good work! ((((HUGS)))) You will always be my son. My heart does not know any different.
Love,
Mom"
I miss him today, although he did what he did. He will always be my son. My heart doesn't realize that he's my stepson and not mine biologically. I love him just the same. Sometimes I feel I should not love him, because of what he did, but I do. I feel guilty about that. I hope that life is treating him well and that he's doing well wherever he is. I hope that he's gotten enough help in these past couple years to make the changes he needed to in order to lead a good life.
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